This song, by award-winning inspirational artists Wayne Burton and Jenny Jordan Frogley, so beautifully expresses what I wish for everyone in the coming year and beyond. Merry Christmas and Happy Holidays!

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Five tribal leaders from the remote South Pacific island nation of Tanna are sent to the U.S. by their supreme chief. Their mission? To bring the message of joy and peace they learned from a very special soldier during World War II – a man they called ‘Tom Navy’ – back to America. The journey is being documented by the Travel Channel in a six-part series, Meet the Natives, which premiers with back-to-back episodes at 9 and 10 p.m. E/P tomorrow night, November 29, 2009.

As a travel writer, the Travel Channel provided me with a special link to preview the first two episodes and frankly, I was blown away. Amidst much hilarity, these traditional hunters and farmers who wear grass skirts and live with no electricity or television, don layers of clothing and learn how to operate a video camera before departing for their first destination, a cattle ranch in Montana. I laughed out loud as they struggled with sleeping bags on the floor of the cabin and then again when they helped the wife cook breakfast – a first, since in Tanna, women do all the cooking. Coming from a culture that produces everything required to sustain the tribe on a daily basis, it is difficult for the men to understand why the Montana ranch contains 5,000 head of cattle, yet the family must buy their vegetables at a store. And why do the cattle eat dry, brown feed delivered by a truck rather than fresh, green grass?

Throughout the journey, the tribesmen search for Tom Navy. Legend foretells that when he returns to Tanna the world will know peace, but they have heard that America is warring with its neighbors and they wish to know if Tom Navy is part of the war. My heart nearly broke when the elders sat down at the dinner table and asked the Montana family if they knew Tom Navy. No? Well, they would just have to keep searching.

Next stop, New York City, where they are swept by limo to the glamorous apartment of a single woman, dine at Sardi’s, find totems at the Metropolitan Museum built by their neighbors back home in the South Pacific, and even learn how to skateboard. Throughout each episode, the insightful observations of the Tanna men force us to look at our lives through brand-new eyes and their simple wisdom has much to say about the way we live and the things we value.

I won’t miss a single episode. Aside from being entertaining, the six-part series imparts powerful messages about life, love, and values. In addition to previewing the video above, you can learn more and view “sneak peek” photos on the Travel Channel’s “Meet the Natives” web page.

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I thought I would forever regret not having asked his name, until I rolled into the same McDonalds a week later. There he was, just like before, food spread across the table and belongings spilling from an overflowing backpack. He wore the same over-sized Carpenter’s jeans, faded brown T-shirt, and velveteen hoodie with the nap worn down to nothing. When he glanced up I was again I was struck by the twinkling eyes, ruddy cheeks, and grizzled beard that put me in mind of Santa Claus.

“Hello again,” I said. His momentary blank expression turned to a wide smile.

“Well hello, darlin’! You’re back. Didn’t recognize you at first.”

“I don’t think I introduced myself last time. My name is Barbara,”

“Rudy,” he replied, enfolding my soft, manicured hand in his rough calloused paw.

He extricated himself from his pile of belongings and joined me.

We had chatted briefly the previous week about being on the street but now I asked the question that haunts me, where the homeless are concerned. Why?

“Because I travel.” He looked down at the table for a moment, lost in thought. “Folks don’t realize that homeless are same as anyone else. Most of us have had jobs, apartments, been married and had kids – at one time. But I really don’t want to give my money to some landlord. So I sleep in cuts and under bridges. It’s cold sometimes, but I’m from Colorado so it’s not too bad. I wake up shivering, but as soon as sun comes up I’m OK. I’m tough.”

“Do you worry about being mugged?” I asked, recalling recent incidents where homeless were beaten and murdered in the Tampa area.

“Oh yeah. You gotta be willing to use this and this,” he said, making fists and throwing imaginary punches in the air.

“But how do you earn money? Do you take day jobs?”

He looked at me hard for a few seconds, then seemed to make up his mind. “Well, darlin’, I’m gonna tell you because I like you. I panhandle for a livin’.” He pulled out his wallet, scrabbled around an inside flap and pulled out a wad of bills. “I started out this morning’ with three dollars and look what I’ve got. I’m good at it! It’s all I need. I like to sleep, like to eat, like to watch a little TV – and I won’t kid you, I like a beer or two. How about you?”

“No alcohol for me any more,” I said.

“How long you been sober?”

“Nearly 14 years.”

He grew quiet for a few moments, then shook his head and replied: “I’m not ready to stop.”

“You gotta be ready, nobody can make you stop.”

His traveling buddy appeared then; he was a bit taller and thinner, perhaps a bit younger, but he wore the same gnarled look. Rudy gathered up his belongings and hefted the swollen backpack over his shoulder with practiced ease.

“You want a little nip before we head out?” Rudy asked his buddy.

“Nah, we got a long way to go.”

“You be good darlin’, we gotta get on the road,” he flung back at me as they walked out the plate glass door. I smiled and waved, watched them for a moment, then bent to my Filet ‘o Fish and fries. When I looked up they had vanished – back to being nameless, faceless, invisible.

Though I am traveling on this Thanksgiving day, I am grateful. Loving family and friends enfold me like a warm blanket, in good times and in bad. I am clean and sober. I love being a writer and photographer. And when I travel, I sleep in a bed.

Many thanks to the Heading There travel blog for featuring this post in their recent Thanksgiving carnival. Check out this week’s Heading There blog to read some other inspirational posts from some of the world’s best travel writers.

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Joshua Bell performs incognito in Washington, D.C. Metro station

In a Washington, D.C. Metro station on a cold January morning in 2007, a man with a violin played six Bach pieces. During his performance approximately two thousand people went through the station, most of them on their way to work.

Three minutes after the young man began playing a middle aged man slowed his pace and turned to look at the musician, but kept on walking.

Half a minutes later the violinist received his first dollar; a woman threw the money in the hat without stopping.

Not until six minutes into the performance did someone actually stand against a wall and listen.

A three-year old boy tried to stop and listen but his mother tugged him along hurriedly. The kid stopped and looked at the violinist again, but the mother pushed harder and the child continued to walk, turning his head to look at the musician as he walked away. This action was repeated by several other children; parents, without exception, forced their children to move on quickly.

In the forty-three minutes that the violinist played, seven people stopped what they were doing to take in the performance. Twenty-seven gave money – most of them on the run – for a total of $32 and change. The remaining 1,070 people hurried by, oblivious to the music, few even turning to look. As he finished playing, silence took over. No one noticed. No one applauded. He received no recognition.

The violinist was Joshua Bell, one of the greatest musicians in the world. He played some of the most intricate pieces ever written, with a violin worth $3.5 million dollars. Two days prior, Bell sold out a theater in Boston where the seats averaged $100.

This is a true story. Joshua Bell playing incognito in the Metro station was organized by the Washington Post as part of a social experiment about perception, taste, and people’s priorities (Read the full, original Washington Post article here).

In a common place environment at an inappropriate hour, do we perceive beauty? Do we stop to appreciate it? If we do not have a moment to stop and listen to one of the best musicians in the world, playing some of the finest music ever written, with one of the most beautiful instruments ever made, how many other things are we missing in life?

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Taking a break from my physical journey today to work on the inner journey, and I can’t think of a better way to do that than to share this amazing video sent to me by my friend Karen. Peace and love to you all…

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A couple of weeks ago I received an email thanking me for posting photos of the old buildings in the village of Matten, Switzerland on my blog. The message, which was from a William Diesslin, read in part:

“You didn’t know it at the time, but you photographed my great grandfather’s store front! I’ve attached the photo for your reference.”

Matten was the town I stayed in when visiting Switzerland during the summer of 2007 and I had taken scores of photos of the intriguing architecture in the village. Curious, I downloaded the photo he had attached – an historical black and white image of an old storefront. I figured it would be a simple thing to find the present day photo among those I had published on the blog and began side by side comparisons. It was not as easy as I had assumed it would be, but by comparing things like the gables, roof line, and the horizontal strip that separated the first and second stories, I was eventually able to identify the correct structure.

Today the building is home to a hostel, the Balmer’s Herberge. The building is located on the same street as my hotel and I had even eaten at the Thai restaurant that now occupies the basement. Take a look at the photos below for a glimpse into the past and an idea of how well these old buildings have withstood the test of time.

Today one of the buildings comprising a large hostel, the Diesslin store hides its age well

Historic Diesslin store; the man standing in the doorway is Bill's great grandfather and the child to his right is Bill's grandfather

A closer look at the store from the opposite direction, as it looks today

But that’s not the end of the story. When I emailed Bill to make sure I’d identified the correct building and ask permission to use his historic photo, I received the following stunning response from him:

“You are welcome to use the photo, but I would wait a few weeks. I’ve contacted the folks at Balmer’s to see if they can confirm this with deeds. The owner is out of country but will return before February.

My grandfather emigrated from Switzerland in 1920. His wife followed him two years later. The old photograph only recently came into my possession. It was sent to a distant relative many years ago. My dad (recently) went to a Swiss Society picnic and someone showed it to him. I have since obtained quite a few family records. My grandfather’s birth certificate indicates that his father (my great grandfather) had the occupation of “handlesmann” or merchant in English. That was the start of the link. (see the word ‘handlesmann‘ in the sign shown in the historic photo).

What threw me off is that I thought the sign in the old picture said J.C. Diesslin. The birth certificate indicated that he was Johann George Diesslin. Zoom in at the picture and see for yourself. It helps if you look at the “C” and “G” in tuchhandlug. The opening at the bottom of the “C” is different from the top. We are quite sure it says J.G. Diesslin, but Balmers will hopefully confirm that for me.

The story gets better, I stayed at Balmer’s in 1988! I had no idea that it was tied to my family. There is something else I want to confirm; my grandmother had a brother and he married a Balmer! This might be something big.

This will be a landmark for my family as my dad was orphaned at 14 years old, all family history was lost. Your photos may have opened up a long lost link to my ancestors.”

My jaw dropped when I read it! Imagine, my blog might have been instrumental in helping Bill trace the history of his family. I waited patiently for the next few weeks, then two days ago, I received an update:

“Hi Barbara,
The owners of Balmers have confirmed that the picture I have is the “old Diesslin house.” They purchased it in 1988. (I am the) great grandson of J.G. Diesslin in the picture; the little boy to his right is my grandfather. Your photo log helped me connect the dots of my family tree.
Kindest regards,
Bill Diesslin”

What are the chances? Think of just some of the things that had to happen in order for Bill to make this discovery:

1. I had to go to Switzerland. I’d never had the least inclination to see this country and ended up there because it was the only direct flight I could get from Tanzania, Africa. Once there, however, I was absolutely enthralled by the scenery and architecture of Switzerland and stayed for more than two weeks.
2. Of all the potential destinations in Switzerland, I had to go to the Interlaken/Matten area.
3. I had to take a photo of this particular building, shot from an angle that would allow Bill to make an identification. Why this building? It was just one among hundreds of lovely old Swiss buildings.
4. This particular photo – just one of hundreds of architectural shots I took during my stay in Matten – had to be featured on the blog.
5. Bill had to discover my blog (I still have no idea how he found it), and examine all the photos.
6. He had to stay at Balmer’s Herberge and I had to stay just down the street.

I could go on about the series of seemingly insignificant events that had to occur before Bill could connect his family dots. There is no doubt that we live in amazing times and that the Internet is an amazing tool, but I have to believe there was something more going on in this instance – somebody’s higher power was working overtime and I am thrilled to have been a part of it.

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Benjamin Zander, conductor with the Boston Philharmonic Orchestra, spoke at TED recently. Beginning with an amusing discussion of classical music and what he calls “one-buttock playing,” his speech takes unexpected twists and turns that he connects with beautifully played Chopin. At the end of his remarks, Zander leaves us with a final, prophetic question. Watch it to the end – he is remarkable and his speech reminded me of my commitment to treat everyone with loving kindness.

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Renowned author Elizabeth Gilbert, who is probably best known for her New York Times Best Seller “Eat, Pray, Love,” recently spoke at the annual conference of TED (technology, entertainment, design), where the world’s most fascinating thinkers and doers are challenged to give the talk of their lives in 18 minutes. In her speech, Gilbert suggested that we need to look at genius in a new way. She proposed that, like the Romans, we accept the premise that creative people are not geniuses, but that creative people have access to genius.

There is no doubt in my mind that she is correct. When I write – when I am truly in the zone – I am all too aware that the words are not mine. They come from somewhere else. Gilbert tells the story of a 90 year old poet whom she interviewed. The poet described how the words would come thundering at her from across the land when she worked in the fields as a young girl. Each time, she ran for the house and a pencil. If she got to pencil and paper before the words passed her by, she would have her poem. If not, the words would continue into the distance, seeking another creative soul. I cannot tell you how many times this has happened to me. I have moments of brilliant inspiration; words fly at me out of the air and hang there, juicy and ripe for the picking. But if I don’t write it down, it is lost forever.

Gilbert also talks about our ongoing battle with fear – that insidious enemy that plagues all creative types. Her speech is a bit long (she exceeded her 15 minutes, coming in just under 20), but it’s well worth watching.

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I didn’t see the lunar eclipse yesterday. It occurred around 8 am. and the sky would have been way to bright (I say “would have been” because at 8 a.m I was still sound asleep, having worked on various writing projects until 3 a.m.). But I didn’t need to see it. I could feel it, and that was quite enough.

Yesterday was just plain Ugh! My energy was so low I could barely function. Everything seemed a giant struggle. Every time the phone rang I wanted to throw it at the wall, because I just knew it would be another problem. I couldn’t write. Heck, I couldn’t even think. They say that the energy of a lunar eclipse is about leaving the past behind and looking forward, but I just felt stuck.

This came on the heels of a month of compete indecision over where to take my life next. I know Lonely Planet is seeking an editor for their Laos guidebook. Should I go off to Laos and Malaysia for a couple of months? To Scandinavia to try and see the Northern Lights? Some time prior to June 15th I need to return to North Carolina to complete my annual real estate continuing education requirement. My father wants me to come back to Illinois for a couple of weeks this summer. I’m thinking about going to a Yoga retreat somewhere, although I don’t know where. Yet with so many options, I was incapable of figuring out what to do.

This morning, even though I’d been up until nearly 4 a.m again, I virtually sprung out of bed at 9 a.m. It was immediately obvious that the energy had shifted. Before noon I had completed two contract articles due this week and (hopefully) found a resolution for the rat infestation in my Key West house. I wrote a long email to a web designer about some changes I am trying to make in my blog (just wait – it’s going to be stupendous!) and received an email informing me that I have been accepted in the BlogHer.com advertising network (yes, I am going to be running a few ads on my blog in an attempt to earn a little money from this hobby passion of mine, but I will do everything possible to keep the blog from becoming overly commercial).

Then I got a call I’d been waiting for. I’m going to be a tease. I’m not revealing what the call was about, but if my gut is right, it’s the answer to my indecision. My Yoga teacher recently told me to do whatever felt right and if I wasn’t supposed to proceed, the Universe would not allow me to follow that path. It was good advice and I took it. Now it looks like the Universe is screaming – DO IT! Curious? Nope, I’m not gonna tell (other than to say it has to do with travel and writing and photography – but that’s really no surprise to anyone who knows me). You’re just going to have to stay tuned. More shall be revealed.

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I saw “The Curious Case of Benjamin Button” this evening.

I laughed. I wept. My heart ached. Joy welled up from deep within my soul. This is a movie everyone should see. I can sum up its message with one quote from Benjamin (Brad Pitt):

“For what it’s worth: it’s never too late or, in my case, too early to be whoever you want to be. There’s no time limit, stop whenever you want. You can change or stay the same, there are no rules to this thing. We can make the best or the worst of it. I hope you make the best of it. And I hope you see things that startle you. I hope you feel things you never felt before. I hope you meet people with a different point of view. I hope you live a life you’re proud of. If you find that you’re not, I hope you have the strength to start all over again.”

I found myself measuring my life against those profound words:

It’s never too late: At 54 I walked away from a successful career to pursue a life of travel, writing, and photography. Two years later, I’m not rich, famous, or successful in any of those things. But I am becoming a better writer and a better photographer with each day. I am editing my book now, and sometimes I read a chapter that I wrote months ago and wonder: “Did I really write that?” I am simply amazed by how good it is.

You can change or stay the same….we can make the best or the worst of it: I am my own worst critic. Just today I was berating myself over a thought that flitted through my mind. I don’t remember what it was, only that it was judgmental, and I thought less of myself for having it. Perhaps I should cut myself some slack, but then I wouldn’t be growing as a person. And becoming the best person I can be is what life is all about.

I hope you see things that startle you. I hope you feel things you never felt before: Ah, the holy grail. I want to see everything. Go everywhere. Meet people who touch me to the core. Help others. I want to be startled, moved to tears, inspired, ecstatic. And I am. Today I walked home from downtown Sarasota during golden hour, those few minutes every afternoon when the sun drops low and turns everything a rich, golden hue. The clouds were so perfect they looked unreal; the sky, a shimmering blue. Birds twittered on telephone lines. People in the shops waved to me and I smiled back delightedly. When things are this intense, this crisp, I know I am fully present and living in the moment.

I hope you meet people with a different point of view: I have spent the better part of my life trying to win people over to my point of view but over the past year, something has shifted. My beliefs and value system haven’t changed, but I am no longer so attached to being right. Suddenly, it is possible to honor others for their beliefs and to listen to their points of view without judgment. It’s much easier to come from this place – makes me feel that a huge burden has been lifted.

I hope you live a life you’re proud of. If you find that you’re not, I hope you have the strength to start all over again: I wasn’t always proud of the life I lived. Fortunately, I found the strength to start all over again. Several times. I don’t often look back, for I find it too painful. I try to be fully present and look for signs along the way that confirm I am on the right path. Benjamin Button is one of the best signs I’ve ever seen that I am on the right path.

Pay attention to your dreams. Your hopes. Your desires and passions. Life is much too short. Live life now. Really live it. From my personal experience I can tell you that it is worth any sacrifice you must make to do so. And see the movie.

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Follow Laura Lee Carter through a midlife crisis with a happy ending!

A while back, my friend Laura Lee Carter over at MidlifeCrisisQueen.com asked me to review the manuscript for a book she had just finished writing. Aptly titled, “Midlife Magic: Becoming the Person You Are Inside,” Laura Lee’s book treats us to the roller coaster ride that was her life, beginning at age 46 when she left a loveless, destructive marriage of many years; through the sudden and unexpected loss of her job two years later; and then follows her as she remakes her career and life, in the process discovering who she really is.

Laura Lee had asked me for a quote that she could use, if I was so inclined. I wrote:

“Hang on, it all changes!” Laura Lee’s mantra provides hope to all who are struggling with midlife crises. By reading her story, I realized that I am not alone, and it is OK to ask for help. Thanks, Laura Lee.”

I was absolutely delighted when she wrote back, telling me she had chosen my quote for the back cover. Over the holidays, Laura Lee told me her book would soon be out in print and asked if I would review it on my blog. I happily agreed, although I decided to read it one more time, since it had been slightly changed since my first reading. I found it just as interesting the second time around, but this time I got a different message from it:

“Never give up. NEVER GIVE UP!”

Laura Lee is an inspiration, to women going through a mid-life crisis, as well as to the thousands of writers who hope to someday have their books published (me included!). Midlife Magic is an easy read that is full of hope, inspiration, and self-deprecating humor. Laura Lee’s book is available through her personal website, LauraLeCarter.com, at Amazon.com, or at BarnesAndNoble.com, for the very affordable price of $14.95 ($13.95 for Barnes and Noble members).

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A tall, middle-aged man just walked into Pastry Art, my favorite coffee shop and bakery in downtown Sarasota. He opened the door a smidge and squeezed through, barring the large Golden Retriever that accompanied him from entering.

“Stay outside,” he said, pointing to one of the tables near the curb. The dog walked away temporarily, but the minute the man stepped to the counter to order he returned and plunked his butt squarely in front of the door. With nose touching glass and tongue lolling out of his mouth, the Retriever watched his master’s every move. His panting fogged the glass in an ever growing circle that impaired his view but still he sat, immobile and fixated on his master.

Eventually, another customer came along. The moment the door was cracked open, the Retriever dashed inside and ran to his master. “Go outside!” the man said sternly, as he opened the door and pointed to the curb. Dejectedly, the Retriever returned to his place under the table, waiting for the moment when they could be reunited. When the man finally stepped outside, the Retriever could barely contain his joy, greeting his master with wagging tail and nuzzles.

Throughout the whole incident, the man frowned and scowled. From the way he petted and spoke to the Retriever while they sat together at the curbside table, it was obvious that he loves the dog. But I couldn’t help wondering if he knows how lucky he is to be the recipient of such love and devotion.

This incident started me thinking about the fact that animals, much more than humans, seem to have a capacity for unconditional love. Recently I’ve come across two stories that illustrate this. The first is a YouTube video of two otters at the Vancouver Aquarium in Vancouver, Canada, who float around holding hands. It is too cute; you just have to see it:

Tarra nuzzles Bella with her trunk. Photo courtesy of CBS Evening News.

The second is a story about the Elephant Sanctuary in Hohenwald, Tennessee, where elephants go when they retire. Each elephant, upon arriving at the sanctuary, chooses a companion with whom they share the rest of their lives. The are, of course, pachyderm pairs. Except for Tarra and Bella. Tarra is an 8,700 pound Asian elephant, and Bella is one of more than a dozen stray dogs that have found a home at the sanctuary. Tarra and Bella are BFF’s (“Best Friends Forever,” for those of you who are not clued into the new Internet shorthand). Even the staff at the sanctuary did not understand the commitment between this unlikely duo until recently. Read what happened when Bella became seriously ill.

At the close of this last story the author asks: “Take good look at this couple, America. Take a good look world. If they can do it – what’s our excuse?” My sentiments exactly.

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In my daily meditations, I use a book titled “Awakenings: Asian Wisdom for Everyday.” The book contains a beautiful photo and an accompanying bit of wisdom for each day of the year. Prior to meditating each morning, I read the saying for the day and contemplate the message during my meditation.

Yesterday it was:

The actions of our daily life

like waking, washing, lighting incense

do not seem very important,

but they comprise the whole cosmos.

by Master Taisen Deshimaru

“Good message,” I thought. I meditated on it. “OK, now back to work. God, I have so much to do today. Better get some of this little stuff done. Gotta make the bed and take a shower. Need to do some grocery shopping. Should try to get to a Yoga class. If I can just get some of this stuff out of the way my day will be better.”

Today was pretty much the same. Make the bed, raise the shades, open the blinds, clean the bathroom, do the laundry, take the garbage out. “I really should make time to meditate,” I thought.” As I walked over to the kitchen counter, my mind was filled with the ‘stuff’ I had to get out of the way before my day could begin. I turned the page of my meditation book to read:

In our daily actions,

let us concentrate on details with great care and attention,

let us make this an ingrained habit for the behavior of our bodies and minds,

like protecting a newborn child.

by Master Taisen Deshimaru

Suddenly, I got it! I spend so much time trying to get things done so my day can begin, when in reality, these things I must do each day are my life. Rather than living in the moment, I am focused on how things will be once I do this or do that. I need to change the way I look at things, to be fully present in every action. Opening the blinds each morning is not a task to be scratched off a list, it as an action that allows the sunshine to stream into my apartment. Doing the laundry provides clean, fresh smelling clothes for me to wear. Preparing food is not an activity that must be ‘gotten through,’ it is a joyful activity that nourishes my body and keeps me healthy.

How can I NOT have seen this before now? If I can change the way I look at these small tasks I perform each day, if I can honor everything I do, much of the stress I feel will drain away. This is my newest goal – to be fully present and mindful as I walk through each day.

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It was my anniversary yesterday. On January 24, 1996 I walked into the rooms of Alcoholics Anonymous, and that was the last time I ever had a drink or used drugs.

The day was a little surreal for me. In some ways it felt like I just got clean and sober yesterday; in other ways it felt like it happened a hundred years ago. I was living in Puerto Rico at the time, managing a bar (great place for a drunk to work!). I was partying every night and sleeping less and less. One night, after hours of drinking and lots of coke, my heart began beating so hard I thought it was going to come right out of my chest. I broke out in a cold sweat and got up to splash some water on my face. When I glanced up into the mirror, I was shocked by my appearance. My face was pasty gray, my skin hung, and my eyes were dull and glazed over. In that instant, I knew I was going to die soon if I didn’t stop.

Flash forward 13 years. My cheeks are pink and my eyes sparkle. I am healthy and happy. My life is wonderful. I know how this happened – lots of hard work and sticking to the principles of AA – but I don’t know why. I often wonder, “Why me?” I have lost several friends to this disease when they ‘went back out.’ Other friends desperately need AA but are unwilling to admit they have a problem. I wish the program was a gift I could give, but addicts have to want it.

There is a saying in AA that is harsh but true: “Some of us have to die so the rest of us can live.” Maybe the deaths I have seen along the way have kept me sober. More likely, it is the ones who go back out that keep me sober; I’ve watched their lives become a living hell and I remember when mine was that bad.

Staying clean and sober is not an easy proposition. This disease is cunning, baffling, powerful, and above all, patient. Just today I was watching a news program about an ingredient in red wine that has anti-aging properties and may be a cure for cancer and diabetes. Using this as justification, I began thinking it would be OK to have a glass of wine each day. Fortunately, I did what I have been taught to do – I thought this action through to its ultimate consequences. I remembered what my life was like 13 years ago and compared it to my present situation. I do not wish to give up what I have today. Thirteen years of sobriety may seem a bit surreal to me, but going back to that previous lifestyle is absolutely unimaginable to me. I can’t even relate to the person I was back then. And I am eternally grateful for the person I have become and all those who have helped me along the way.

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For the third straight morning, I roll out my Yoga mat on my living room floor and sit in half lotus pose. I straighten my back and rest my hands on my knees palms up, bringing the tips of my forefingers and thumbs together to create circles. Closing my eyes, I begin Ujjayi breathing, generating a sound reminiscent of the noise Darth Vader makes when he breathes. Ujjayi breathing allows me to feel my breath and I concentrate on following it in and out of my body. I draw air in through my nostrils and across the back of my throat, filling my stomach before I fill my lungs. I hesitate for just a second at the top of the breath, then exhale through my nose, emptying my lungs first and then my stomach. Pulling my belly button into my spine, I squeeze the last bit of air out of my stomach and then hesitate once more before drawing in another breath.

I envision heavy, negative energy leaving with each exhalation and bright, light energy entering my body with each inhalation. At some point I realize that my tongue is glued to the roof of my mouth. Gently I peel it away, allowing it to hang loose in my mouth, which forces me to unclench my jaw and relax my face. Breath flows to every part of my body, draining away all stress and tension. As I turn my gaze inward to my third eye, focusing on the spot between my eyebrows, a feeling of peace and serenity envelops me. The incessant chatter in my mind ceases and I feel as if I am floating, blissful.

I am not always so successful with my meditations. Sometimes I am so distracted that I find it impossible to get “into the zone,” but even during those times I find that beginning my day with a meditation – however brief – makes a tremendous difference in my life. Meditating sets the tone for my entire day. It helps me to keep things in perspective and to focus on the things in life that are truly important; things like loving kindness, unconditional acceptance, non-judgment, and caring for one another. So why do I resist doing it? During the past month I did not roll out the mat a single time. I created excuses. I was traveling and my normal schedule was disrupted. There was no good space available for meditation. I’m too busy today; I’ll do it tomorrow. Yada, yada, yada.

How ridiculous are all those excuses? No space? Give me a break. I could sit lotus in the smallest of spaces. No time? My mind tells me that I am not meditating unless I can sit for 30 minutes, but in truth I only need to commit to one minute. One single minute every day to clear my mind. What is so hard about that? What is it about the human condition that makes us resist what we know is in our best interest? I feel so much better when I meditate each day, yet I find every excuse not to do it.

Perhaps it will make a difference if I put it down in writing:  “My New Years resolution is to meditate for at least a minute each day in 2009.” In addition to being my witnesses, in invite you all to join with me in the pursuit of inner peace. Those of you who have never practiced Ujjayi breathing may wish to check out the following video, which provides a clear explanation of the technique:

Happy meditating!

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